“He leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs- to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish.  It is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be. Hence the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please Him best.” – Screwtape Letters C.S. Lewis

I read this today and found my own life stuck as it were in letter 8 of the Screwtape Letters.  It seems as if I have been waiting in a trough period for some time and my only consolation is that through the process I am becoming as Wormwood called it “a loathsome little replica of Himself- creatures whose life, on its miniature scale, will be qualitatively like His own, not because He has absorbed them but because their wills freely conform to His.”

Sometimes, the waiting processes takes longer than we believe we can endure.  The following was written in May of 2008 and it is as true today as it was when I first penned it.  My circumstances may not have altered much, but God has remained the Rock of my salvation and an ever present help in time of need.

What are you waiting for Lord? Is it me that is waiting or are You? I am holding up the process or are You? What are You waiting for? I waited patiently for the Lord, He inclined and heard my cry…Have you heard Lord? Have I been patient enough? Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength, they will mount up on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary…. God I am waiting…I haven’t any place to go and I am weary…Please hear my cry and answer me.

I am still waiting on the Rock in the middle of the raging river, waiting Lord, waiting for You to make the waters subside. Some days it seems that their is a change in the water, a slowing, a calming and a bit of sun peaking through the stormy sky, but then nothing happens, nothing changes and all things remain as before….standing between two points, with no place to make a move, or a decision. God we are standing on Your promises, and we are weary, and we are begging you to hear our prayers, our cries, our passionate pleas, and yes I am begging that you would alter the course of this raging river and give us dry, solid and conclusive ground to stand on.

What are you waiting for? Is is me or is it You? Please Lord, could you say, times up? Could you call our name as we wait and tell us it is our turn? I am listening, but perhaps not hearing….I am straining my eyes to see a direction, but can’t make anything out. Please strain Your eyes to see my tears of earnest prayer, and Your ears to hear my prayers….Oh God, what are you waiting for?

When in the trough, I cling  to the promises in His Word.  I am confident of this, that He who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6).  So I will “wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD”  (Psalm 27:14).

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